Thursday, January 6, 2011

How I feel... Defined by Lyrics Vol. 5, No. 1

Happy belated New Year!

The one that passed was a good one for me in terms of people I met, dealing with the family and finally moving out into my own spot... The joys of falling up!

"dream bout that crib with the Goodyear swing
on the oak tree, I hope we feel like this forever
Forever, forever, ever, forever, ever?" - Outkast

But this year starts on a bad note as my father came up to me and told me 2 days ago that after getting an x-ray, his doctor stated it might be a tumor...

"you play whatever cards he deal no matter how peculiar
they tell me that its God's will, I'm asking God 'will ya?'" - J. Cole

I froze... Now it's not confirmed yet, but let's just say I spent 2 days seriously out of it... Not mentioning it to anybody else, keeping this pain and fear inside. I tried my best to replace it with prayers and hope, but it's hard. I always think too much... seeing different scenarios in my mind, visualizing my reactions, the outcomes, re-evaluating life in general.

"I say my prayers cause this life ain't fair" - J. Cole

We won't get news until Tuesday when my father has to go for an MRI to confirm whether or not it is a fact a tumor.



"yea, lets see God
I know you only do whats best for me
but is it cool if we negotiate my destiny" - Omen

I'm trying to stay focused until then this is how I feel :



5 days to go...

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